|
Post by codystarbuck on Dec 3, 2023 2:37:22 GMT -5
Also, he is always in his wetsuit. I'm starting to think he is a rubber fetishist or something. His body odor must be pretty rank, from all of the sweating. I suspect that the book is acting under some kind of restriction from Hasbro that the characters had to resemble their action figures, which is particularly awkward for Torpedo.
Certainly later in the run characters would be shown wearing clothing more appropriate to their mission. In particular, the main story in G.I. Joe Yearbook #4 has Torpedo and Wet-Suit dressing and acting like real SEALs, i.e. in fatigues and cammo face paint being inserted on to Cobra Island at night via rubber raft with conventional weapons (I specifically remember the MAC-10 with sound suppressor).
I seem to recall Hama saying in an interview that at a certain point Hasbro just started trusting him with the title, and that the only time a directive came down from Hasbro was when he had to include new characters in the book (which usually amounted to them appearing in a single issue).
Oh, I know it is a Hasbro requirement that they resemble the toys; I just like to needle them over the piss-poor depiction of the US Navy. When Shipwreck is introduced I intend to launch the mother of all rants. I may run out of substitute characters for the profanity.
|
|
|
Post by jason on Dec 3, 2023 18:14:06 GMT -5
I suspect that the book is acting under some kind of restriction from Hasbro that the characters had to resemble their action figures, which is particularly awkward for Torpedo.
Certainly later in the run characters would be shown wearing clothing more appropriate to their mission. In particular, the main story in G.I. Joe Yearbook #4 has Torpedo and Wet-Suit dressing and acting like real SEALs, i.e. in fatigues and cammo face paint being inserted on to Cobra Island at night via rubber raft with conventional weapons (I specifically remember the MAC-10 with sound suppressor).
I seem to recall Hama saying in an interview that at a certain point Hasbro just started trusting him with the title, and that the only time a directive came down from Hasbro was when he had to include new characters in the book (which usually amounted to them appearing in a single issue).
Oh, I know it is a Hasbro requirement that they resemble the toys; I just like to needle them over the piss-poor depiction of the US Navy. When Shipwreck is introduced I intend to launch the mother of all rants. I may run out of substitute characters for the profanity. Good thing Captain Grid-Iron never showed up in the comics, I'd hate to see that rant.
|
|
|
Post by codystarbuck on Dec 3, 2023 21:24:13 GMT -5
Oh, I know it is a Hasbro requirement that they resemble the toys; I just like to needle them over the piss-poor depiction of the US Navy. When Shipwreck is introduced I intend to launch the mother of all rants. I may run out of substitute characters for the profanity. Good thing Captain Grid-Iron never showed up in the comics, I'd hate to see that rant. You probably don't want to hear my thoughts on Top Gun, either.
|
|
|
Post by codystarbuck on Dec 9, 2023 22:09:27 GMT -5
GI JOE #28Perspective or no perspective, that aircraft is too low to pull out of that dive! ps Why is Tony Stark driving the tank? Roll Call: Larry Hama-writer, Marie Severin & Andy Mushynsky-art, Rick Parker-letters, George Roussos-colors, Denny O'Neil-editor, Jim Shooter-dreams of being Al Haig Mission Report: Tripwire, Torpedo and Mutt (and Junkyard) return to the cutter, in the Gulf of Mexico. Duke rendezvous with them, via the dragonfly, because Hasbro was too stupid to make a Blackhawk for the toyline and the only helicopter they can use in the comic is a gunship. Apparently....... I'm gonna assume that no one at Marvel thought about the implications of a black character having to ride the outside skids of the helicopter, rather than the interior. Given the very real racial legacy of Vietnam, which was still very fresh in the US Army, of the period, this was a serious error on somebody's part. The JOE point out the location of Zartan's shack, in the swamp and the team prepares for a heavy assault. Meanwhile, Zartan reports in that the JOE's escaped to a mother ship, which mean attack is imminent and they aren't getting paid enough to stick around and chew bullets. Cobra Commander calls Destro, who is in the Cobra MOCCASIN, with the Baroness (they are chaperoned), who radios back that they took the liberty of bringing some forces down to Florida, for just such an emergency. So, a Cobra Plot Convenience Battle group is staged nearby. Meanwhile, Steeler and the MOBAT have wandered into a Hal Needham movie..... Jackie Gleeson is Tarzan's father? Wait, wasn't Tarzan killed in Vietnam? Meanwhile, on the cutter, the damn groundpounder doesn't know port from starboard..... ...and why does Deep Six look like Gilligan and the Skipper had a love child? That's the best they could come up with, for him out of his dive suit? They launch both the Dragonfly and the WHALE (Water-borne Hovercraft Assault Landing, Experimental which makes less sense than actual military acronyms), regardless of whether they have proper winds coming across their flight deck for the helo to get airborne. Meanwhile, the WHALE launches from bow doors, instead of stern, like most assault craft from an amphibious landing ship. I guess they have some miracle pumping system to displace all of that water that they are accumulating in the bow. Did I mention that no one at Marvel had any nautical experience, except Jim Starlin and Dave Cockrum and they were otherwise engaged? Should have at least given Sam Glanzman a call. Meanwhile, Destro and baroness launch a squadron of Warthogs...I mean rattlers, from within hangers, disguised as oil storage tanks on a petroleum farm. Unlike the A-10, these are capable of VTOL flight. Somehow. As there are no signs of vectored thrust, like a Harrier, or tilting fans/rotors, like the Osprey or previous VTOL experimental aircraft. Baroness and firefly peel off to pick up Cobra Commander, from the swamp shack (sounds like a Louisiana Restaurant chain). Said screeching head honcho and his camouflage flunky see the inbound JOE attack on monitors and Firefly discovers that some of the console controls are fake and rips off the facade, to reveal remote controls for drone attack units, because.......... Plot convenience? CC is tired of Firefly bogarting the joystick and says "Gimmee!" Meanwhile, Jackie Gleeson & Mike Henry are still chasing the tank, even though its maximum speed is only 60 mph. Duke is inbound on the Dragonfly and they have spotted the Cobra air support, while the tank and the smokies have run into the robot drone HISS tanks and infantry. Despite numerical superiority, the MOBAT hasn't taken a single hit for the massed Cobra drone force. Instead of sending the gunship, with anti-tank missiles and a 20 mm gatling gun, Duke vectors the hovercraft to provide back-up to Steeler. The Cobra air support arrives and the defecation is about to hit the oscillator. Meanwhile, Baroness arrives in Springfield, the Cobra base, disguised as small town America, even though the JOEs have been there, twice. She goes to visit Major Bludd, in his cell. The MOBAT hides in te trees, but their heat signature is detected by destro. The fuzz decides t head for a swamp shack, to hide out. Guess which one? The JOEs pour water on their engine block to cool it down quickly and it disappears from Destro's scope (NO, NO, NO, NO.......). Roadblock and Deep Six are firing twin .50 cals at the Rattlers and deep Six hits Destro's, but he is still active. He dispatches Wild Weasel to get Cobra Commander. Deep Six is hit and his gun mount is jammed. Roadblock lifts out TWO .50 CAL HEAVY MACHINE GUNS, IN A TWIN MOUNTING (84lbs each, plus the weight of the steel mountings) and supports them on his back, so Deep Six can target Destro. (**COUGH**-Bull@#$%-**COUGH**) Destro ejects. Wild Weasel picks up CC and he tells firefly to put his thumb out, for a ride home. Firefly flips him the bird, then flips a grenade into the shack, destroying it. Buford & Junior observe the explosion from the treeline. The JOEs regroup and treat Deep Six's wounds (without a corpsman present...where the @#$% is Doc?) Dragonfly says medevac is inbound and they are clear of Cobra. Firefly stomps through the swamp, bi@#$%^& about CC, when he runs into Destro, who asks if he wants to get even. I smell a coup coming on.....or at least a fragging. Meanwhile, Zartan and his Dreadnoks think they are in a Roger Corman biker movie..... (Dave Allen and the Arrows!) Analysis: This is all kinds of stupid, which is probably why Marie Severin came in to do the art. Larry Hama was the editor of Crazy and Marie did a bunch of work on that; so, it figures. She was a great caricaturist, hence Jackie Gleeson and Mike Henry appearing as their characters, sort of, from Smokey and the bandit. No Burt, Sally or Jerry Reed, though (no Fred, though we do still have Junkyard). Deep Six is in no naval uniform I ever saw, in my 8 years associated with the service. No one....I repeat, no one...ever wore their "dixie cup" turned down, like Gilligan. For the most part, you didn't wear them on board ship. Sailors had been wearing ballcaps at least since Vietnam. Also, his physical size suggests he couldn't past the annual physical fitness test; certainly not the sit ups, and probably not the 1.5 mile run (which was a sprint for me, after nearly 3 years of doing the Marine Corps Physical Fitness Test, in NROTC...pull ups, sit ups and 3 mile run). I take it there is no steroid testing in GI Joe, because Roadblock isn't executing those kinds of lifts without being on the "juice." Roadblock being the abnormally strong character also gets into racial stereotypes that probably weren't intended, but do display a troubling lack of attention to such things. The tactics in this just boggles my mind, especially from a veteran of a combat zone. Hovercrafts can achieve high speed; but, their maneuverability is another matter, since they float on a cushion of air and need rudders to steer, just like a conventional boat. The difference is that a conventional rudder can dig into the water more and make better turns, depending on the size and mass of the vessel. Since Steeler was taking fire from an armored unit, it would have seemed a better strategy to dispatch the gunship to give them covering fire to withdraw and have the hovercraft go after Cobra Commander. Either way, he gets away. Also, gun mounts on a hovercraft are not going to be situated for anti-aircraft fire. They are sighted to lay down suppressing fire as they land troops and vehicles (in the case of LCACs). The heat signature business is total BS. You cannot cool off an engine heat signature, with water, fast enough to make it disappear from an infra-red scope. As it is, most military ones could also detect the bodyheat of the crew, at that kind of range. So, unless they are diving into a pool filled with ice, they are FUBAR. The bow of the cutter opening to deploy the WHALE may look good in James Bond films; but, that is just a big scoop for sucking in water and that is going to suck for the ship. Even LSTs, which have bow doors that open to deploy a landing ramp and launch tanks, deploy landing craft from either davits or from a deck in the stern. Same for other amphibious ships. Now, for Duke's education; port is left, starboard is right, always used in relation to the bow. Deep Six should have been correcting him...or Cutter. I assume Deep Six was too busy wondering if Maryann made her famous coconut cream pie, for dinner. Either that or picturing Ginger in her bikini. Actually, probably the pie, based on his shape. The hidden video game controls for the drone army makes no sense, even from a plot contrivance standpoint. I assume they are trying to illustrate Zartan's whole false facade gimmick; but it is to dumb to sustain. Don't get me wrong, the story is dumb fun; but, no one over the age of 10 is going to treat this as anything other than Hogan's Heroes silliness. Even Schultz was more competent than Cobra, though. Klink was General Patton, compared to Cobra Commander. At least there weren't any ninjas. Next time: I don't know.....maybe the JOEs will team up with Megaforce, or something. That film is still better than those actual JOE movies.
|
|
|
Post by codystarbuck on Dec 9, 2023 22:18:06 GMT -5
ps For those confused, Mike Henry played Tarzan in three films, before marrying Margaret Houlihan: Tarzan and the Valley of Gold, Tarzan and the Green river, and Tarzan and The Jungle Boy...
They tried to turn Tarzan into a sort of Jungle James Bond.
It didn't work.
Henry could also be seen in The Longest Yard, as one of the guards.
|
|
|
Post by foxley on Dec 10, 2023 0:31:24 GMT -5
At least Deep Six is depicted outside of his dive suit, so he's doing better than Torpedo.
|
|
|
Post by codystarbuck on Dec 10, 2023 1:13:06 GMT -5
At least Deep Six is depicted outside of his dive suit, so he's doing better than Torpedo. Pretty certain that, behind his back, the JOEs called him Deep Sux.
|
|
|
Post by codystarbuck on Dec 20, 2023 17:42:49 GMT -5
GI Joe #29Interesting departure in style of cover. At first I wondered who the artist was, since I didn't see a signature; but, the twin .50 cal machineguns and the linked ammo belt suggested Michael Golden, which GCD confirms. It almost looks like computer coloring, which is what threw me. Had it been the usual coloring (Golden colored it), I probably would have said Golden, from the start. The one thing, to me, that said Golden was the charging handle on the right side of the starboard .50 cal. That is a real detail that your average artist will miss, even with photo reference. Anybody who has ever fired a .50 cal machine gun will recognize it (I have; you press the trigger and pretty much hang on!) Creative Team: Larry Hama-writer, Frank Springer & Andy Mushynsky-art, Rick Parker-letters, George Roussos-colors, Denny O'Neil-editor, Jim Shooter-COMMARVFUNBOOK (Commander, Marvel Funny Books) Synopsis: Apparently, Larry Hama thinks the period is 1974 and the JOE team is a bunch of National Guard, on maneuvers..... The JOEs press on with repairing battle damage, while the crowd heckles, until Roadblock messes with some of them, using a piece of armored plating... Meanwhile, Destro and Firefly make their way through the swamp and decide to work together to pay back Cobra Commander. He receives a hero's welcome, in Springfield and Mayor Diamond Joe Quimby gives him the key to the city. However, Milhouse (or some other kid) vows to kill him, for the death of their parent. Wild Bill choppers out to the support freighter (it is called a freighter, not a Coast Guard cutter; I gave them too much credit for accuracy in this), with Deep Sux....er, Six, on a stretcher, mounted to the gunship's skid (these guys need a utility helicopter, Hasbro) to get his wound's treated. The JOEs continue to repair the WHALE (their hovercraft), both the armor, the engines and repairs to the rubber skirting, using bicycle repair patch kits. meanwhile, Destro and Firefly have captured an air boat and try to force the owner into pointing them to a boat that can get them out of the Keys and into the Atlantic, but he refuses, until Destro threatens to drop him in the swamp, bound, to be gator food (I would worry more about just drowning). He then gives up the location of Ehrlinger's Cove, which just happens to be where the JOEs are carrying out their repairs. Meanwhile, Cobra Commander is addressing the faithful at Nuremburg, while vowing to Make Cobra Great Again.... He then talks about their success in weaponizing Yuppies..... Back in Florida, Destro pulls his boat quietly up to the pier, where Cutter is distracted with his work (under cover of darkness). They take down Cutter (after a fight, which Duke and Roadblock, on the pier, do not hear, presumably because they are welding). Firefly grabs a twin .50 and takes aim at the JOEs. Roadblock braces the armor plate in position and it stops the .50 cal from penetrating (despite being high velocity, armor piercing rounds, in general) and apparently carries no kinetic energy to knock them on the hinders. Destro then backs out the hovercraft, without ever removing any mooring lines. Wild bill approaches with the Dragonfly. Duke hops into the gunner's seat and tells Roadblock to get Cutter to medical care and alert the freighter (codenamed GI Jane, though it doesn't look like Demi Moore). After they take off to pursue the WHALE, Cutter comes to and hops into a fishing boat to get out to the Jane and alert the forces. Roadblock argues, then joins him. Destro is piloting the WHALE overland, headed for the interstate north. The run into Sheriff Justice and RL, coming out of the swamp and knock them back in. A Trans Am may have also passed by. Wild Bill and Duke spot them and engage. Meanwhile, Cutter pilots the fishing boat to the Jane and tells them to way anchor. From here on, Hal Needham takes over..... The Jane gets word that the WHALE is heading for the channel to the Gulf of Mexico and heads for Ehrlinger's Cove, to try to block them. They deploy hydrofoils and engage gas turbines, even though their smokestack indicates they are a steam turbine vessel and now Terrence Young takes over the action... The Jane loses its hydrofoils and scrapes bottom, but cutter ignores (won't ignore having his rudder and screws damaged, though) and blocks the WHALE's approach to the channel. The twin .50s are jammed and the Dragonfly calls out that they are stuck, with nor armament and to surrender. Destro answers with his wrist rockets, which hit the engine of the Dragonfly, sending them into a spin. Cutter keeps his course, towards the helo, to try to push up a cushion of air (why doesn't he just dump loads of foam rubber mattresses on the deck, so they can land like the Batcopter, in the 1966 film?). Wild Bill gets enough lift to make a hard landing on the deck of the Jane. Firefighters (dressed in old school land firefighting coats and hats, not US Navy and Coast Guard gear) man hoses to control the fire from the stricken aircraft, as they extract Wild Bill and Duke. Firefly tries to rig a depth charge. The Jane continues to bear down on them and opens their bay doors (scooping up tons of water, which has to go somewhere, but those are just details) and nabs the WHALE, but finds that Destro and Firefly are gone and the hovercraft has been boobytrapped. Tripwire tries to get it over the side, trips and shields the bomb, at which point Friz Freleng takes over as director. Roadblock picks up the bomb and throws it through a vent funnel, where it bounces off the deck and over the side..... Roadblock chastises Tripwire for Hollywood heroics (the military trains you to dive for cover, not to throw yourself on grenades or land mines), then realizes the depth charges launched by the WHALE were escape pods for Destro and Firefly and Duke calls the bridge to intercept them. Unfortunately, the shrimping fleet has set out and there are a sea of boats between the Jane and the barrels. We then see Destro and Firefly in the wheelhouse of one of the shrimping boats, along with some idiot who keeps droning on about Bubba and Lt Dan. The Cobras head for the Atlantic and to find a port to then transfer to other transport back to Springfield, for a reckoning. Thoughts: More mindless action mayhem and plot holes, not to mention a complete defiance to the laws of physics. I tried to research the skirting on military hovercraft, to see if they have kevlar on the skirting or just industrial grade rubber and couldn't find any info. The hulls are armor plated, though that can compromise speed and the Vietnam Era PACVs used to remove the crew compartment armor to reduce weight, as it wasn't thick enough to do much good, above small arms fire. Hovercrafts can move over land, though I doubt they would survive crashing through a diner, to continue on. <ost likely, they would do more damage to the skirting than the previous gun battle had. Lose the skirting, lose the air cushion and you now had a large sled, without runners. Where to start on the GI Jane? Well, at least they aren't showing that awful movie onboard! Based on the relative size of the thing, it is at least as bigg as a Medium Endurance Coast Guard Cutter. Those are either 210 or 270 feet in length and displace about 1800 tons. The world's largest hydrofoil was the USS Plainview, a hydrofoil research vessel, built in the late 60s and decommissioned a decade later. it was about 220 feet in length, but only displaced 310 tons. There is no way you are getting 1800 tons airborne on hydrofoils. Aslo, the Plainview's conventional propulsion engines were diesel, not steam or gas turbine. The hydrofoil propulsion came from modified F-4 Phantom jet engines. Somehow, after wrecking their hydrofoils tearing up the pier/causeway or whatever that was, and scraping along a shallow channel, they are somehow still able to navigate. They would be stuck; pure and simple. Landlubbers! To continue the nitpicking, a .50 cal round will penetrate your average armor plate; and, even if it doesn't, it has a s@#$-ton of kinetic energy when it hits it, which is going to be more than a human could handle, when it impacts a piece of steel plating they are holding, with no structural bracing. I don't care how 'roided up Roadblock is, we are talking superhuman levels. Even Arnie doesn't do that sort of thing in his movies. he just never gets hit my 5000 rounds coming from the world's worst marksmen, while mowing them down with only 30 rounds of ammunition, fired from the hip. I guess they didn't have rifle training in the Austrian Army. Leaving all of the logic and reality out of it, it's a fun and exciting "chase" issue, the print equivalent of a late 70s/early 80s Burt Reynold's movie or Stephen J Cannel tv series. You could just as easily paint the Jane orange and put a Dixie flag on it and let the Duke Boys steer the vessel and achieve the same effect. Waylon Jennings would cost extra, though. The running subplot, though is that there is a civil war brewing within Cobra, as Cobra Commander has lost the support of his key officers and they seem to be preparing a coup. Larry Hama does a bit of editorializing, as he equates Amway and Gordon Gecko & Yuppies with Cobra's fascist aims; and, you could make the connection between those phenomena (and similar investment schemes) and the rise of the conservative government of the Reagan and Bush Administrations in the US and the Thatcher government in the UK (plus other similarly conservative governments in France and Germany and Japan). Hama has never struck me as a Lefty; but, I suspect he was using this more for a social commentary than a political one, plus a bit of comedy. The idea of Yuppie sleeper agents, though, does bring to mind things like The Manchurian Candidate and the thriller Telefon, with Charles Bronson, and Donald Pleasance, as a rogue KGB officer activates sleeper sabotage agents, while another KGB officer tries to stop him, before he sets off World War III. For the Action Film Challenged, Hal Needham, as discussed last time, was a stunt man turned movie director, who directed several Burt Reynolds films, such as Smokey & the Bandit, as well as the GI JOE-ish Megaforce (soldiers in spandex!), who was noted for car chases and lots of smashing of things. Terrence Young was the key director of the early James Bond films (the good ones, with Sean Connery), including Thunderball, which features a hydrofoil chase, in the finale. Friz Freleng was the legendary director of Looney Tunes and merry Melody shorts, for the Schlessinger Studios (which became Warner Bros Animation, after Schlessinger sold out), most often noted for his violent characters and explosive sight gags, particularly the cartoons featuring Yosemite Sam (who was somewhat modelled on Freleng's size and temperament). Hama gets points for debunking the Hollywood trope of someone diving on a grenade, to save the rest of the platoon. The real military teaches the opposite. During my week of training with the Marines, during my second summer training period, one of my fellow midshipmen dropped the dummy practice grenade he carried and another threw himself on it, to the horror of the Marines leading us through a "combat town" simulation. Later, the midshipman didn't think it was so funny when we witnessed a demonstration of checking dead bodies for boobytraps and one of those practice grenades rolled out and the firecracker exploded, next to one of the "body's" hands, giving them a pretty wicked powder burn. These were de-fused grenades, with the equivalent of a fire cracker inserted into the casing, which was activated by pulling the pin (like a real grenade), but creating a loud bang and no shrapnel. A corpsman jumped up to treat the wound and the officer in charge of the demo, whose back was to the scene, , said, "it's okay, Doc, its just a simulation." To which we called out, "No, sir; the Marine has a powder burn on his hand. The officer turned and looked down at the man and replied, "Sorry, Doc; carry on." We were more careful with those practice grenades, after that. (they only gave them to us twice, fro the combat town and for a simulated ambush). Last issue, we were kind of mislead into thinking that we would see the Dreadnocks at work, in this issue, though the upcoming title was "beached Whale." This one ends with the title, "The Dreadnocks on a Rampage." So expect lots of biker movie references, next time. The letters page includes (presumably) Jim Shooter having Denny insert a shout out to the "most popular, most enthusiastically received Marvel title ever!" Somehow, I suspect a survey of letters pages of the period have similar missives, though this was in reference to issue #26's cover, by Mike Zeck and Bob Wiacek. Might not have a subversive intent; but, given what I have read about Shooter's ego and Secret Wars, from insiders, I kind of think it was deliberate. Still, what is a Marvel Comic without hype? ps I took a peak ahead an there will be more nautical rants in store for the next review.
|
|
|
Post by codystarbuck on Jan 1, 2024 16:23:16 GMT -5
GI JOE #30I just don't understand modern art! Creative Team: Larry Hama-writer, Frank Springer & Andy Mushynsky-art, Rick Parker-letters, George Roussos-colors, Denny O'Neil-editor, Jim Shooter-riding on the back of the bike Synopsis: Music! Davie Allan & the Arrows-"Blue's Theme," from The Wild Angels. Zartan & the Dreadnoks (silly name for a band) just happen to be sitting outside McGuire Air Force Base, when they spot the Dragonfly coming in for a landing. They recognize it (duh, it's an AH-1 Cobra gunship....they have a ton of them, since Vietnam) and suspect that the base has some connection to GI JOE. Zaratan goes in to check it out, disguised as a colonel, who is just waved on, without displaying identification. Damn Zoomies! The colonel he picked is Hawk and he snows the JOEs. Wild Bill, who is wounded, reports in, while Doc notices that "Hawk" doesn't seem to know Wild Bill's call sign. Meanwhile, on Staten Island, the Cobra sleeper agent, has just bought a house, right near Ft Wadsworth, and we all know that neighborhoods around military bases are nothing but prime real estate, suitable for family dwelling. If you believe that then let me show you National City sometime. Zartan reports in and Cobra Commander mentions that McGuire was the point of origin for the plane that transported him to the Rockies. He orders Zartan to stay and stakeout the base. The boys set up shop in an old garage, after Zartan projects a hologram to make it more homey. Our sleeper agents move in, with a lot of weaponry, though no one notices, in America.... Everyone has an arsenal of assault weapons.....it says so in the NRA newsletter! The Cobra Couple set up surveillance of Ft Wadsworth, because the JOEs were stupid enough to continue using the same base that Cobra previously attacked and damaged. Then again, they have been to Springfield, but haven't returned in force to destroy it. The JOEs rush Wild Bill and Deep Six to the medical bay, where they find a surprise..... Wild Bill asks how he got there from McGuire so fast and Scarlett says he has been at base, the whole day. They smell a rat, though that could just be chow. Cobra Commander is convinced that McGuire is the GI JOE base and sends troops to attack it, in disguised circus trucks (the Arbco Bros Circus....though Rick Parker screws up and adds an extra O, in one panel). Meanwhile, Billy, the rebellious Springfield kid is digging through files at the Arbco offices and fidns information about how Cobra moves its HISS tanks around. However, he is caught by the Baroness and Major Bludd. They make him an offer he can't refuse...to join their conspiracy. Cobra Commander orders Zartan to send out the Dreadnoks to recon the perimeter fence and cut the wire, nearest the control tower, at Zero Hour minus ten. CC then issues a recall to the sleeper agent, who throws a hissy fit because he will be out his deposit. Hawk scrambles a response team and we see all of the JOE's armor headed for McGuire. You know, one tank, one missile carrier, an APC, a Humvee and a motorcycle doesn't make for much of a vehicle column! The Dreadnoks cut the fence, at the prescribed time; but, then decide to go have some fun. They proceed to re-enact the SAS raids, in North Africa..... (WARNING: soldier potty mouth) and smash everything in sight, including Ace's Skystriker fighter jet (F-14 Tomcat, which is a naval plane, not an Air Force). Meanwhile, Cobra unlaods and stages HISS tanks and SNAP helicopters, to provide support for an assault team, as they plan to do things quietly. Uh oh! The base sounds a security alert and CC witnesses the explosions, caused by the Dreadnoks. He alters the plan and sends in everything he's got. The Dreadnoks head the other direction, to avoid CC's wrath and run smack into the JOE response team.... The Dreadnoks didi out of there and Hawk orders the JOEs to let them go and concentrate on the main Cobra force. They turn the tower searchlights on the Cobra tanks, to make them easier targets, but the Cobra helos target and destroy the lights. They then make an attack run on the tower, but Clutch shoots them down, with the VAMP's armament. The JOEs spot Cobra Commander, on his tank and Steeler fires a round into it, knocking it out. CC escapes on the skid of a SNAP helo. The next morning, they survey the damage and Ace cries over his broken fighter. Hawk tells him that Uncle Sam will buy him another.... FOR $38 MILLION DOLLARS! Glad to see how much you value tax payer dollars! Friggin military-industrial complex!Meanwhile, Destro and Firefly arrive in New York harbor, in a shrimping boat, which is about 19+ hours by car, which can move faster across land than they can across water. Thoughts: The Dreadnoks are dumb as a bag of rocks, apparently, which makes you wonder why Cobra Commander would hire the ninnies. Then again, the rest of the bunch isn't exactly cleaning up on Jeopardy. This is mostly just a battle issue, to show off the toys as, like I say, they include all of the JOE vehicles that had been released, plus the Cobra HISS tanks and SNAP one-man helicopters. Realistically, the SNAPs are scaled at too small a size to carry any significant armament; but, I doubt the average kid cares about that. Still, the Dragonfly is way cooler. The sleeper agent Crimson Guard member seems completely wasted, as a subplot; so, I have to assume something else is brewing with him. Maybe he we be part of Baroness' rebellion. Right now, that is about the only interesting element of this year's stories, as everything else seems to be just advertising and general mayhem, to sell toys and comics. Hopefully, the subplot will start to move more to the forefront and we can get some meat in these issues. I am a little annoyed that for the Cobra attack to work, the Air Force security personnel have to be morons. That is a sign of lazy writing, to me. Far better to build some tension with the Dreadnoks or other Cobra types having to dodge patrols and such, to get in. Also, you don't get access to a military base without at least displaying your ID and checking in at the security office. When I was commissioned, I had to check out with the Naval Detachment, at Chanute Air Force Base, which was a training facility and not home to any fighters or bombers and even in uniform, I had to show my ID and go into the security office to sign in and get a temporary parking pass. That was just to pick up my orders to my first duty station (US Navy Supply Corps School, Athens, GA, for 6 months of training). A base that is handling tactical aircraft for a special operations unit, and a secret one, isn't just waving colonels onto the base. Hawk mentions that the opening ceremonies for the rebuilt PITT are coming up; so, I assume that will factor into the year's finale.
|
|
|
Post by codystarbuck on Jan 11, 2024 19:36:27 GMT -5
GI JOE #31Destro with some vague toy gun, there. Creative Team: Larry Hama-script, Rod Whigham & Andy Mushynsky-art, Rock Parker-letters, Christie Scheele-colors, Denny O'Neil-editor, Jim Shooter-guard duty Synopsis: The JOE's return to Ft Wadsworth and even civilian kids think a Chaplain's Assistant school has a lot of hardware...... Our sleeper agent is still in his home, having been ordered to stay and start over. he observes all of the JOE armor coming into the base. Gee, those civilian houses are right up next to the gate of an Army base; who knew that property was so welcoming to family dwellings? The neighborhood around the Charleston Naval Station included old burnt out stores, a diner where ladies of negotiable affection congregated (not many diners see a large female clientele, wearing spandex outfits with strategic cut-outs, Daisy Dukes & fishnets and sky-high heels), a few industrial sites and a lot of buildings in bad shape. Cobra Commander contacts the sleeper and receives the report and says that the sleeper will be entertaining guest, soon. Get out the Ritz Crackers and the Cheez Whiz! At MCguire, a C-130 takes off, with Ace in his pressure suit, for some reason, including oxygen helmet, and Wild Bill in no breathing gear and his cavalry hat, along with Hawk and Snake Eyes. Hawk says it is a training flight, but if Snake Eyes wants to parachute out of the plane when they cross over his mountain cabin, that is his business. Well, not if he is using a government issue parachute. That's misappropriation of government property. The plane has a homing device on board, planted by Zartan, while everyone else was getting blowed up. Zartan calls CC and tells him the flight path. When they are over the High Sierras, Snake Eyes does a free fall jump and Hawk calls up Airborne and Spirit Iron-Knife to follow. Sighhhhhhhhhh........... Fred, the sleeper agent, is interrupted by his "daughter" and told that the visitors are in the kitchen. It is Firefly and Destro. They say Fred will accompanty them on a GI Je Hunt. Destro gets a call about the aircraft position and they move out for the High Sierras.... Doesn't sound like THAT quiet a place for a cabin! Spirit Iron-Knife....oh, lets just call him Oscar...finds the homer and crushes it under his moccasin boot. Must have left the headdress at home. He jumps out, shouting "GATEWOOD!!!!!!!" Meanwhile, Snake Eyes plays fetch, with a wolf (it ain't Devil, because he is in Bangalla) and the wolf growls. Snake Eyes looks up to wards the mountain summit and stares at a spot. Up there, Oscar drops out of the tree and tells Airborne that Snake Eyes saw him....from 10 miles away, through pine branches. Down the mountain, Fred stops at a gas station and aks about an old Army buddy who lives in the area. Gomer Pyle directs him up the mountain road. Gomer missed seeing the guy with the metal face, under the fedora.... Shazam! Elsehwere, the Baroness and Major Bludd recruit Billy into their conspiracy and tell him he gets to be Oswald...... ...or Travis Bickle. Fred stops at Snake Eyes cabin and calls out, "Is anyone home?" and claims to be lost. Snake Eyes appears in his working clothes and Destro shoots at him with a Mauser C98, but misses. Airborne and Oscar hear the shots and start their 10 mile run, downhill, to the cabin. Snake Eyes returns fire with his Uzi and the Cobras take cover behind Fred's car (I had three more payments!). Destro fires a rocket at the cabin. Snake Eyes ignores it and keeps firing and hits the gas tank which....... ....lets gasoline leak out. Shooting a gas tank doesn't make it explode. You have to have the right mix of gasoline and oxygen and a source of ignition. Too much Hollywood! The car explodes (ugh!) and the Cobras try a frontal assault. Snake Eyes actually changes magazines, for the first time in this comic series and returns fire, from behind a table. No one is able to hit a target, so no one dies. Firefly lobs in a grenade and Snake Eyes fields it and throws it back..... Another comes in and SE dumps the table on it and dives out the window, as it explodes. Airborne and Oscar finally make it to the cabin and start firing, while Airborne alerts him... Ha-ha.... very funny........Destro corners a wounded Snake Eyes in the cabin and says he will die like a dog, when irony strikes.... Does this mean that Snake Eyes is a StarK? Airborne spots Firefly on the roof of the cabin, with a satchel charge, moving to the chimney and tries to flank him, but gets hit by Fred; but, he hits Firefly, as he falls. Firefly still drops the satchel charge down the chimney and rolls off the roof. Oscar shoots Fred. Destro sees the satchel charge and runs out the cabin and exchanges fire with Oscar. The charge explodes, destroying the cabin and wolves watch and listen, from a distance. Thoughts: Okay, lets get this out of the way, first. Why Oscar? If you notice the picture of the crying indian, as he the image was known, the actor is Iron Eyes Cody. He was not a Native American, but was Italian, born Espera Oscar Corti, but used the name Iron Eyes Cody. He made conflicting claims to Native American heritage, throughout his career, before his full heritage was known. Spirit Iron-Knife is basically a Native American caricature, from start to finish. He is one part Tonto and one part actors like Corti, who were mostly white men or ethnic types who were dressed in stereotyped native American costumes, whether they were accurate for the specific tribe or not (most often as Lakota Sioux) Why does a Native American soldier need to be in stereotyped garb? Even an unauthorized uniform? I trained with a couple of Native American Marine Options and they didn't have long hair, headbands and moccasins. It's an insult to Native American history and culture to reduce them down to stereotyped image. It is even an insult to show him dressed as an Indian Scout, who were basically turncoats, who worked for the Army, hunting their own people. Many served honorably, but they were looked upon with disdain by their people, in the era and are still controversial in Native American groups. Other Native Americans served in the armed forces, after the Indian Wars and wore standard uniforms. One of the most notable groups were the Navajo "code talkers," who were used in the Pacific, with the US Marines. Other tribes and languages were also used; but Navajo was one of the most prominent. So, why not honor that heritage? I get that the Indian Scout is an image that has been seen in movies and tv shows, in that type of uniform; but, those series ignored the reality and controversy of it. Many of those Scouts were ill-treated after the rebellious tribes were subdued and they were never fully trusted by the Army and subjected to racism. Granted, later native American servicemembers were also subjected to racism. I just think it reduces things to a bad example, rather than celebrate the heritage. I know they think they are; but it is in ignorance. You can point to Tim Truman's Scout; but, that name and the red stripe he draws across his face is brought up, by the gahn and he points out it is the mark of the hated scouts, not the People. It is part of Santana's character makeup that he is conflicted by his background. He tries to invoke his heritage and uses his dress to symbolize his rebellion against the government, though it is also practical, for the desert environment. Truman used actual Apache legends and practices to inform the character. On top of things, according to the character file on the toy backing, Spirit is a Shaman. Why does every Native American character need to be a medicine man or a spiritual figure? It just drives me nuts that they are so reductive with this character instead of educating the children who might play with the toy or read the comic. You'd think a writer from a minority group background would be more sensitive to this; but, there you go. Ignorance knows no culture. At least he doesn't speak in pigeon English. Even from a practical standpoint, his uniform look ridiculous. When they jump, he has no helmet, no jump boots, like Airborne. So, he is immune to head injury or ankle? It's lazy and I'm calling it out. However, this is the only time I am going to do it, or call him Oscar. Espera just didn't work as well, to make a point. If they had shown him in standard uniform, with logical haircut and then shown him dressing in civies to celebrate his heritage, I would give this a pass, even with that name. Anyway, enough ranting. The firefight is like something from the A-Team, until people finally get wounded. Good look scooping up a grenade and throwing it back before it explodes. Chances are, the fuse isn't long enough, especially if the thrower held it for a count before tossing it in. Generally speaking, most didn't trust the fuses to conform to the specs and tossed them as soon as they released the "spoon." Fort Wadsworth's locale seems to fluctuate. Early on, it looked like you'd expect a military base. Now, because the story requires it, there is a residential neighborhood, right outside the main gate. Generally speaking, mist families didn't want to live right by a military base. For one thing, they are noisy places. For another, people were always wary of soldiers in garrison. Generally, near an Army base (or other service bases) you will find lots of pawn shops, bars, strip clubs and the like, or industrial facilities owned by businesses who do work for the military. They are not usually residential zones. Military housing would be contained on the base, though more would be living in civilian housing. Base housing usually has long waiting lists and rank is a factor. The real Ft Wadsworth was right along the water, on Staten Island. It was transferred to the US Navy, to be used as the HQ for the Naval Station New York, in 1979, then turned over to the government, where it became a park, in 1995 and is part of the National Park System. Ace being in a high altitude pressure suit looks ridiculous, when everyone else is in normal uniforms (or the JOEs' abnormal ones). Why he is dressed in that is beyond me, even for the toy, since his fighter jet is a standard f-14, and not an SR-71 or something like that, or an X-Plane. He'd wear a normal flight suit and g-suit, a flight helmet, with visor, and would have an oxygen mask in flight. If Deep Six can be depicted dressed like Gilligan, outside his dive rig, why can't Ace? While I get that Hasbro probably required them to illustrate the characters like the toys, we have seen several in civilian attire and undercover, so I question whether it was in the contract that rigidly or if it was because those characters got so little characterization that they felt it was the only way they could be identified, which again brings up Deep Six. I still cry BS on that subject. Kids may not care; but let them write their own reviews. Beyond that, the Cobra civil war conspiracy broadens to include Billy. You would have to question the intelligence of using a kid to assassinate Cobra Commander, but Cobra has repeatedly shown itself to be a bit light in the brains and common sense department. Maybe they figure he has the best chance to get close to CC, though past issues suggest otherwise and von Stauffenberg was able to bring a bomb in a briefcase and place it just a few chairs away from Hitler. He didn't send in little Heidi to show der Fuhrer her new dolly, rigged with TNT. Meanwhile, where is the kid going to hide a Colt Python? This isn't a snubnose .22 or a Walther PPK. It would be big in my hands, let alone a kid. They show it being pulled out of a floral bouquet, but it looks like it has a 6 inch barrel. It also fires a .357 magnum, and has a heavy trigger and a large frame, as a result. Not as big as a .44, like Dirty Harry's Smith & Wesson Model 29, but big enough. You better have a really big bouget to hide that sucker! Why not set the kid up with explosive and a smaller pistol, make him think he is going to shoot CC and then detonate the whole thing? It's not like the Baroness and Major Bludd are too concerned about little Billy.
|
|
|
Post by codystarbuck on Jan 11, 2024 19:47:00 GMT -5
ps Why did I say Spirit jumps from the plane yelling "GATEWOOD!!!!?" It's a, I say it's a joke, son....rib-tickler, that is! Lt Charles Gatewood led the troops who hunted dwn and accepted the surrender of Geronimo. He was greatly respected by Geronimo for his tenacity and for keeping his word. It just seemed fitting for a native American to utter his name, when jumping from an airplane, as a counter to white paratroops yelling GERONIMO.
|
|
|
Post by foxley on Jan 12, 2024 7:08:52 GMT -5
Ah, just say it was on the mule that fell in the river. I assume the US military has a similar story, but in case it doesn't, this is a reference to a story that has circulated in the British army for decades, going back to at least WWII. Like many military stories, it may have its genesis in a real event but none knows where it originated. The story goes that a unit kept a list of all the equipment that had been lost or disappeared and could not be officially accounted for until an incident occurred that could account for its loss. This happened when a pack mule was swept away in a flooded river. A list of all the gear the mule was supposedly carrying as they now had story to explain its loss. However, if anyone had evver bothered to add up the everything the mule was supposed to be carrying, it would have been more than fie mules could carry.
|
|
|
Post by codystarbuck on Jan 12, 2024 11:29:16 GMT -5
Ah, just say it was on the mule that fell in the river. I assume the US military has a similar story, but in case it doesn't, this is a reference to a story that has circulated in the British army for decades, going back to at least WWII. Like many military stories, it may have its genesis in a real event but none knows where it originated. The story goes that a unit kept a list of all the equipment that had been lost or disappeared and could not be officially accounted for until an incident occurred that could account for its loss. This happened when a pack mule was swept away in a flooded river. A list of all the gear the mule was supposedly carrying as they now had story to explain its loss. However, if anyone had evver bothered to add up the everything the mule was supposed to be carrying, it would have been more than fie mules could carry. Oh, we had similar things. In the Navy, the problem often was the number of life jackets (the inflatable kind) that a division was supposed to have. You had to be able to show all of them in an inspection. Now, that wasn't something that usually ended up somewhere other than the ship; but, they often got stored in places where they shouldn't, or a drill was performed and the sailor just stuffed it in a locker, somewhere, instead of the proper storage area, afterward. Sometimes you shifted them around to cover during the inspection, then swept the ship until you found them (or claimed damage and ordered replacements). Combat was a great way to write off equipment. No one questioned it. Our bigger problem was tools going missing. We had tool lockers, on board ship, where items had to be checked out and you had to turn over your ID card to check them out. So, if you wanted to even leave the ship again, you turned the tool back in.
|
|
|
Post by jason on Jan 13, 2024 12:19:23 GMT -5
And Spirt was yet another character who had his filecard changed:
One version's bottom paragraph begins with "Charlie is a Spirit and ends with Spirit's mysterious powers of the mind extend the limits of the most advanced psychiatric procedures known in our culture.
The other version's bottom paragraph begins with "Charlie is a Shaman and ends with There isn't any equivalent in our culture for what he is unless we had shrinks that could actually help people.
Dont know which one was the original (though I suspect it was the latter with it's casual mocking of psychiatry).
|
|
|
Post by jason on Jan 18, 2024 16:42:57 GMT -5
Getting into a more generic question, was it ever explained how Cobra Commander (and the later Vipers who had the same type of helmet) was able to see through his battle helmet?
|
|